6:45 am

Early morning. Classical music. White skies. I will soon leave for work.  I am feeling really happy – I can feel my mojo working again and I am so excited about the upcoming photo shoot. I haven’t used my camera in months now. I miss the hunt. To find the exact right moment and then – click! No wonder it’s called “shooting”, because you feel like a hunter behind the camera. I miss a lot of things.

To paint – and get really messy.

To work in PhotoShop and to feel my subconscious making all the decisions.

To write. To have my heart and mind wide open, no filter, no barriers.

The more I get into the routines of my daytime job, the more I appriciate the freedom I have as an artist. I love who I am – and who I demand to be in this world. I feel proud of how hard I am trying to hold on to all that, even in the ‘real’ world, because it is not easy.

Tonight, Andy will come here and we will go through some technical stuff before he will capture my adventure at the hotel with his video camera. Once this project is finished, I will try to get back to work with the last piece of my new collection.

I feel close to having closure on this collection. The vision is leaving me – or maybe I am leaving it behind, I can’t tell.


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