My mind has been blank for almost a week. No substantial thoughts. No ideas. No energy. No flow. My creative focus is very fragile and sensitive to external negativity and it is still easy for me to be sucked down a destructive rabbit hole of fear and anxiety. I haven’t been able to work since the terror attack in Stockholm last Friday. I’ve been feeling low during the days and waking up in panic at night. This really triggered something painful deep inside me. A sense of a looming darkness. A notion that I am always close to another hateful attack, like in my trauma. I haven’t quite been myself in a week and I know it’s coming from this fear – the fear that feels so familiar and real. My PTSD is once again triggered and has taken over my everyday life. I need to shake it off. I need to let it go.
Meditation and reconnecting to my core is all I need. I will be back when I am starting to feel like myself again.